Pennsylvania Republican introduces GRINCH Act to protect Dr. Seuss from evil government bureaucrats

From WHTM News, via WTRF.com:

The Guarding Readers’ Independence and Choice (GRINCH) Act seeks to protect classic authors, including authors such as Dr. Seuss, who have been criticized for materials deemed to be offensive.

“The GRINCH Act will prohibit taxpayer dollars from funding bureaucrats’ attempts to censor children’s literature and determine what our kids are permitted to read,” added Dr. Joyce.

Since 2019, Dr. Joyce has visited 20 public libraries across nine counties in Pennsylvania’s 13th Congressional District, delivering hundreds of books from the Library of Congress — among them children’s selections.

Okay, first of all, GRINCH is simply not an acronym for “Guarding Readers’ Independence and Choice Act.” That would be “GRICA.” Or, if I’m going to be really generous, “GRIACA,” which at least has the correct number of letters. Dr. Seuss didn’t teach me much, but he taught me that. 

Secondly, exactly when do bureaucrats use taxpayer dollars to censor children’s books? Has that even happened? I know Dr. Seuss’ estate made a free-market decision to pull a handful of books from its catalog that featured objectionable (i.e., super racist) drawings, but I don’t recall Joe Biden convening an anti-Seuss task force.

The truth is, lots of products get discontinued for all sorts of reasons. For instance, I can’t find Fruit Stripe gum anywhere. Where the fuck is my Fruit Stripe gum, Republicans? Why isn’t the thing I want throwing a madcap rager in my mouth as we speak? I chewed Fruit Stripe gum as a child. I want some now!

Thanks, Trump!

By the way, Joyce is a medical doctor. Like Ben Carson.

If I’d known becoming a doctor was this easy I might have done more in biology class than dress all my dissectin’ frogs in a series of increasingly twee Polly Pocket outfits.

Anyway, it’s heartening to see Republicans step forward for the rights of Scrambled Eggs Super, even as Republicans undermine the rights of voters.

We’ll get through this, folks. Keep the faith. And remember, there are no atheists in Fox in Socks-holes. Or something like that.

”This guy is a natural. Sometimes I laugh so hard I cry.”  Bette Midler on author Aldous J. Pennyfarthing via Twitter. Need a thorough Trump cleanse? Thanks to Goodbye, Asshat: 101 Farewell Letters to Donald Trump, Dear F*cking Lunatic, Dear Pr*sident A**clown and Dear F*cking Moron, you can purge the Trump years from your soul sans the existential dread. Only laughs from here on out. Click those links, yo!

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